CHAPTER 2

Pein turned in surprise. “Sasori?” He gingerly took the baby from Konan and held him at arms length. “This thing is Sasori?” He flipped the baby upside down, ignoring Deidara and Konan’s gasps. “It’s too small to be-”

“WAHHHHHHHH!!!! Ahhn! Ahhhhnnnnnn!!!!!” Sasori wailed, thrashing in Pein’s grip. Pein dropped the baby like he was a bomb, and Deidara dived to catch the sobbing infant.

“Pein!” Konan yelled.

“He’s just a baby un!” Deidara said from the floor, trying to calm the screaming child.

“You can’t hold a baby like that! He’ll die!” Konan shouted.

“Both of you hold your tongues! I am the leader and you have no right-”

“Oi! Deidara! I though I told you to stop with the fuckin’ crying!” Sasori’s sobs stopped immediately as he stared in fascination at Hidan, who stood in the doorway of the kitchen, his scythe lodged into his bare chest, rivulets of blood running down his chest and dripping on the floor. He’d apparently been in the middle of a ritual. Behind him, the rest of the Akatsuki was gathered, staring at the scene in the kitchen.

Sasori giggled at all the attention he was getting and stretched a hand out in greeting. “Gahhh!”

Pein, Konan and Deidara sweat dropped. There was a lot of explaining to be done.

~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~


“So let me get this straight. You lied to us about a mission so you could sneak off to the old base and see Sasori. When you arrived, instead of finding Sasori’s puppet, you found this child.” Pein said slowly.

Deidara nodded, wincing as Sasori pulled at his hair. “That’s… correct un. I found him there.”

“And you say that that baby is Sasori?” Pein pointed to the bundle in Deidara’s arms then turned to Konan, who nodded.

“Look.” She gently wrenched Sasori from Deidara. “The hair, the eyes, that smirk,  he can’t possibly be anyone but Sasori. And if you need further proof.” She showed them the baby’s bare chubby left arm, where a small tattoo of the sign on Sasori’s heart cabinet was. “Who else could it be?”

“I noticed that too...” Deidara said, taking Sasori back into his lap. “When I was giving him a bath un...” The other members gave him a blank look. “Oi! He pissed and crapped himself un, so I had to clean him! He’s a baby un!” He retorted angrily, a blush spreading over his face. Sasori giggled and yanked Deidara’s hair again, making the blonde’s eyes tear up.

“Well, now then, I suppose we have to keep him then, if it really is him.” Pein sighed.

“Pein-sama! This means one more mouth to feed!” Kakuzu spoke up. “This means more money to be spent!”
“A baby doesn’t take much to feed, fucker. All they do is drink milk.” Hidan growled. “And after a certain age, they eat mush. Not a fuckin’ problem.”

“I think he’s about 6 month’s, seeing as he’s so responsive.” Konan said, watching Sasori grab Deidara’s finger. “He’d be eating ‘mush’ as you call it, Hidan, about now; As well as milk. And soon he’ll be able to eat solids. We have a lot of money, since Sasori, the puppet Sasori, didn’t eat. We can afford it.”

“That’s settled then. Konan, you and Deidara go into Amegakure and get things for Sa… this baby after lunch. And take him with you.” Pein ordered. “The rest of you are free to do whatever. Dismissed.”

“Well, guess someone’s playing mommy now, huh?” Kisame teased as the Akatsuki, minus Pein and Konan, left the meeting room. He ruffled Deidara’s hair.

“Shut up.” Deidara growled. “I’m nobody's mommy un.” Sasori giggled and clapped before pulling Deidara’s hair again. The others laughed and Deidara left the group, heading for his room.

“Unnn...” He sighed as he arrived in his room. He closed the door and shut it, putting Sasori on the bed.

“Soo, Danna un....” He stopped with a sheepish grin. “Right, you’re not the same Sasori I knew, un. Sorry Sasori-kun.” He ruffled the baby’s red hair, earning a squeal in return.

“I still can’t believe he’d do this, un. Just like Danna; always had a trick up his sleeve.” Deidara sighed, lying back with Sasori on his stomach. “You’re so cute Sasori-chan.” Deidara said, poking Sasori’s cheek. The little puppet master giggled. Deidara suddenly felt his stomach growl. “Ooops, I guess I need to eat un. You too, Sasori-kun. Lets go.” Deidara sat up and cradled Sasori as he went down to the kitchen.

“Well, Sasori-chan, what’s for brunch, hm?” Deidara held Sasori against his hip as he poked through the pantry and fridge. “What do babies eat un?”

“Mushed food.” He turned to see Konan standing at the table, a bowl in her hand. “I’ve already taken the liberty of making him something. Bring him over here.” Deidara complied, sitting next to Konan with Sasori on his lap.

“Ok, these are mashed bananas. Open up, Sasori.” Konan spooned a mouthful into Sasori’s mouth and smiled when the baby swallowed. “They really are a wonder, aren’t they?”

“What, un?” Deidara asked, looking up at Konan.

“Babies.” She placed the last spoonful into Sasori’s mouth. Deidara grabbed a napkin and turned Sasori around to wipe his face, only to get banana spit-up all over his cloak.

“Oh, sorry. I forgot to mention. They spit up… a lot,” Konan apologized, taking Sasori as Deidara cleaned the front of his cloak. “Give me your cloak, I’ll see that it gets clean. Now go and change into something causal. Also, leave your headband and ring here. I’ll see you in a few minutes.” She handed Sasori to him and waved him off to his room. Before leaving she paused.

“Oh, and Deidara,”

“Yea, un?”

“Bring your paycheck.”

OWARI ~ END!